'Aspiration, Inspiration, and Expiration'
“The universe, I'd learned, was never, ever kidding. It would take whatever it wanted and it would never give it back.”
(Cheryl Strayed:Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail)
The universe does not joke around when it comes to YOU. Why? because you are the goddamn universe. You better believe it, you're a part of this as much as anybody else - running away is inevitable, life itself, is an inevitable journey.
What if, this was an escape from the true reality? That all of this, this crazy world is our dreamscape? Would you be happy with it? Well if not, too bad, you live in it.
With that said, I wanted to mention this quote I posted earlier in the year:
"Some people look for a beautiful place, others make a place beautiful."
Now I think that's truly wonderful... Why? because even with all the craze and negative perspective that people, media, and your own prejudice of your own ego; whatever they or it feeds you, their all stigmatic and bias. Sometimes you just have to go with the flow, to risk the chance of learning what especially is out there, even if sometimes you don't know what's out there. You will soon after you do it.
Now for that oddly stated introduction, I just wanted to say, hey, yes hey that it's been absolutely expirational in terms of how long I've been putting off this post. Yes, I hate myself. But I guess it's the best time as any? after all, it goes with the theme. Being late, and expiration. So hey, I'm not so hopeless after all!
For all things wonderful and positive, I just wanted to say, my life has been totally and utterly wonderful in terms of how filled things have been lately. Although my family has been, well always the same, I can't say it hasn't gotten worse, I mean it's gotten better. I just hope it lasts and improves over the course, or god sakes, I will find a way to find my introverted butt out of this toxic place you call "home" - But of course, there's no place like home and home is where the heart is at. So I can't say I don't try...
As to where my presence and focus has been for the past ... well months, I've just been reflecting, questioning, and well... more questioning. That I slowly understood, questioning was the problem, too many questions that I couldn't solve, at least not yet.
School... don't you just hate that word? Well, with school just around the corner, you can't help but wonder, what the hell is going to happen, how or what will this be like? You start to contemplate all the things that completely don't even matter until you brought it up. Like who's gonna be your friend or how you're gonna feel. No shutup, you're not there to socialize or to be the coolest kid there in the corner. You're there with a purpose, to learn, to get somewhere in life. Yup, that's right. It ain't highschool where you get to be the most cool and get away with shit. This is real life knocking on your door son/daughter. Believe it, this ain't Naruto, but you best believe it!
Yeah, that's how scary it may seem. Entering a new chapter is like entering a cave, not knowing where this cave will lead, or what kind of freakish mutant ninja turtle is gonna jump out and grab your bum. But truthfully, I made a decision in my life that I thought would end terribly, why? because it was a quick and honest decision I had to make with myself when deciding what college and what program I would be going to for the first time. And man, was it a bumpy and reactive ride, and when I say reactive, I mean unprepared and seriously fate striking reactive. Be free flowing, but be proactive. It will save your life. (thank god for my back up): Reason why I say that is because my backup became my decision.
Yes, I must say, sometimes you just have to trust your decision with a hint of risk taking. Why? because sometimes you never know the outcome. Life is a gamble, really it is. No, it doesn't mean gamble your life away, it means take risks in order to gain progress. At times you'll move up two steps, but fall down three, another day you'll gain seven and move back six. But believe me, progress takes patience, and when you have patience, you have time. - And that's what I did, I waited out for the good moments, the rewards or opportunities that following. And I took whatever I felt would be good for me. Which all lead me to the first orientation, the information was wondrous! I walked into the school filled with nervousness, thinking I couldn't possibly make friends that day. But luckily I was just being myself. Quiet, listened and questioned. Guess what? I stood out more than I thought I did. I pushed myself, just a bit, and I ended up being invited to a Leadership Camp, from starting from no opportunity to many. That small effort lead to results I thought I could never have had achieved.
When I say achieve I mean really achieve, by personal experience, I would have never done the things I've done, and I couldn't have done it alone. Without the aspiration and inspiration, there wouldn't be me here today, in this current place and time. I opened up, and spoke in front of 100 plus people. Man, that's crazy, especially to me...
You can never allow the time to pass, or the opportunity to fly, you never know the rarity of it until it's gone, wishing you could of had it back. Expiration? that's the most important thing to remember, don't let your important chance to change in life expire. But do let your disappoint expire, because those are the things you need to let go of, the disappointments.
Potential, it's all you. You're the decider, the artist. So start painting your vision...
"Don't let your dreams just be dreams!"